Britt: Dreamz in Solitude …

I’ve been talking to Britt for quite a while about doing this project. And having known her for three years it freaked me out that she was in prison because she is truly an excellent person so I guess we all have to understand the being in prison is not a matter of being good or bad – it boils down to bad circumstances mixed with bad luck mixed with people that really aren’t your friends.

On top of it, I am pretty isolated in my current living situation and I don’t see my family as often as I need to and my job is very intense. So I get busy, and have alot of different pots boiling on the stove, that when I see these messages coming in from J-pay (Jail) – I feel an enormous amount of guilt because I realize that I’m pretty free to do whatever I wish, I can go anywhere I want to, when I want to – and it’s easy to forget that I may be that one ray of light to someone stuck in a remorseless dungeon where the walls want to crush your soul.

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I cannot effect any sort of change in Britt’s life right now, but I can change the perception she has of herself in terms of where she can see herslf as even having any sort of future.

I think in anyone’s life, when they see their life as hopeless – the smallest sparkle of a chance, that once-in-a-lifetime glimmer of hope, that if it is offered? It is like a breath of redemption for a drowning soul.

We’ve all been there, and perhaps for me this is a gasp for my own personal redemption of sorts. I tend to be that person that is capable of helping everyone else except himself. And all that implies to me, is that it’s really hard to look in the mirror sometimes.

So this blog, this effort, resonates as my own mirror as well– the one I have to look at every morning when I get up. We all have to accept ourselves for what we are at some point in life- or why live it? So yeah- this is MY mirror- This MY chance to sum up the courage to actually like what I see.

MT

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Thats the end of this part for now… Thanks for listening and hearing me.

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Britt